Tuesday, 14 April 2009 00:22
What kind of world do we live in?
I have seen worse things on TV then Blair Waldorf having sex with Master Bass in the back of his limo. I’m talking about 'American Idol'. Does anyone still watch this nonsense? I watched the trainwreck of auditions but I cannot name you the top ten contestants. The only time I’ve seen their name is when my favourite gossip blog mentions them and even then, I skim through and laugh at how he mocks them.
So this weekend when I was sitting at home and flicking through television and procrastinating writing articles, I saw 'Gossip Girl' on television. Were my eyes deceiving me? Blair Waldorf in the Hamptons on my television at three in the afternoon? This, people... is not season one but rather season two. What was season two doing on television at this time and not on at a more appropriate time like… oh I don’t know… IN PLACE OF 'TWO AND A HALF MEN', or in that one hour time slot on a Sunday where TV2 airs those stupid televisions shows. I’m talking 'Top Town' and 'Who Dares Wins'.
Seriously, trade in those stupid reality television shows because no one likes them and they aren’t funny. Replace them with quality shows like 'Gossip Girl' and 'Ugly Betty'. Don’t even get me started with 'Ugly Betty'... this amazing show is on at five thirty. Was anyone else aware of this or am I the only one who didn’t get the memo? Again it was a case of me flipping channels and being all “HAIMICHAELURIE.” Seriously, does anyone watch television at five thirty anymore? I’m glad I am a uni-bum because if I was at work I would be missing out on this show, just like I did with 'Gilmore Girls' a few years back.
TV2 likes to do this to us, why? I don’t know. All I know is that they like to screw us over and get bad ratings for good shows and then put the blame on us when the show does badly.
I’m sorry I’m busy at ten thirty on a Friday night. But maybe if you aired shows earlier instead of giving us an hour of sitcom re-runs and then the show, we would be able to watch. OR even better yet, get rid of those sitcoms and that hour of American Idol that we don’t need and replace it with two hours worth of 'Gossip Girl'.
We don’t need re-runs of 'Two and a Half Men' and the 'New Adventures of Old Christine'. We CERTAINLY don’t need 'American Idol' at all. Who plans these television shows for them? Even my dad wouldn’t watch this dribble. In fact he hates 'American Idol' and would rather watch 'Gossip Girl'. My dad is hardcore like that. My dog would rather watch 'Gossip Girl' because Ruby is a bigger bitch than Blair Waldorf. I kid you not, Ruby is a fatty and Blair looks tiny, so it’s legit.
Plus watching Nate be referred to as “ManBangs” is way funnier than the kid in 'Two and a Half Men' who grew up more awkward then Brendon Urie. I understand if the sitcoms were funny, maybe just maybe I could let it slide. I’m not asking for an hour of 'Friends' here, I’m simply asking for maybe half an hour of 'Scrubs' and then 'Gossip Girl'. That would’ve been a good choice from the beginning. But why are they airing such a darn good show at such an asinine time? Just watch as they slowly decide that it’s doing too bad and will cancel it all together on us. Then our only option will be to watch it online. Oh wait, that was my late-night viewing pleasure throughout last year.
If TV2 wants people to watch their channel and not watch smarter channels like TV3 (because I love 'Bones' and 'Project Runway') or C4 (because… 'Rock of Love' is a giant trainwreck and Bret Michaels is nastier then a Hilton, after she’s taken her STD meds) then they better get their act together. Move 'American Idol' to the Sunday time slot because no one cares anymore. People aren’t following it. Move the reality TV hour on Sundays to Friday nights so no one feels guilty about missing it and then put 'Ugly Betty' and 'Gossip Girl' back-to-back starting from six thirty.
Why am I not working for TVNZ? I would rake in the ratings like leaves on an autumn day.
While I’m here, let’s just stop with crappy reality television anyway. I’m looking at 'Top Town', 'The Amazing Race' and what-not. Bring back family shows like 'Full House', 'Saved By The Bell' and my personal favourite 'Captain Planet'.
- Global Warming is not cool kids. Captain Planet could save us.
... and if you are going to do reality television, at least make sure it's good. I mean, 'American Idol' has drained the talent from America - all we have left are people who sing "all right". Its not like they’ve found the next Aretha Franklin. When they find the next Dean Martin tell them to call me, but for now I do not want to see some emo kid ruining Johnny Cash for the world on my television at such a good time slot.
TV2 needs to get its act together. Get it together fast before I end up pulling a Georgina Sparks on its ass.
